I woke up this morning and felt a bit more energized compared to yesterday. I was still exhausted but knew I had to get my butt moving if I wanted to make it to Mississippi and see Abby.
So I finished packing, got ready, and went downstairs to print out my bus ticket (because I had the awful realization last night that I was not riding on MegaBus anymore and therefore would need a paper ticket and couldn't just show them the confirmation email on my phone). Wahhhhhhh. So I printed it out, stripped my bed, called a taxi company, and checked out of the hostel.
After a short cab ride I got to partake in one of my favorite travel pastimes: people watching. And let me tell you: the people watching around here is fantastic! So I sit and take it all in. Then I watched last night's episode of Nashville, because, well, hello?! By the time it was over it was time to board the bus.
This whole journey to Jackson, Mississippi was made up of two buses: the first from Nashville to Birmingham and the second from Birmingham to Jackson. The first bus was one of the crappy old Greyhounds without Internet or electrical outlets. A couple things it did have: a foul smell and an unidentified, crusty stain on the seat next to mine. Probs vomit. But once I realized that it was there it was too late for me to find another seat/I didn't want to get up. So whatevs. That just meant that I stuck to my seat and avoided the stain altogether. One plus side to having a vomit stain as my seatmate? It made for a good excuse to turn people away when they asked to sit next to me. Score!! I was also lucky enough to get a really outspoken group of fellow bus riders. When the driver stepped on board, a gaggle of Greyhound's finest proclaimed that the bus smelled like shit. Mmmmkay, you see, I'm not a fan of funky smells either, but you don't hear me complaining to the powerless bus driver.
Unfortunately, the bus made a couple of stops, and since we were already running 30 minutes behind schedule, I started to freak out about making my connecting bus in Birmingham. This was when things got laughable. Now, keep in mind, I couldn't make this shit up.
At one of the stops a fresh batch of passengers got on. OK, not weird yet. THEN right as we're about to leave, a man comes running up. At this point I'm sitting at the very front of the bus with a perfect view of the crew handling the checked baggage that's stored under the bus. Well, this guy who just showed up had something he wanted to store under the bus. But it wasn't just a suitcase or a guitar or something, because that would be too easy. Instead, he had a HUGE, abnormally shaped box, which I later determined to have a deconstructed bicycle in it. I'M SORRY. WHAT?! Now the crew is saying that there's no room under the bus, and the guy is freaking out, and one of the crew members suggests waiting to check it on the next bus at 6:30. Instead of considering that, the driver (who throughout the trip proved to be super lame and not that bright) then tells the guy to find space for it INSIDE THE BUS. Now, excuse me, I'm no expert at spatial relations, but even I knew that this would not be as simple as Ms. Greyhound thought it will be. You see, they design these buses so that small luggage and handbags can be kept inside the bus and large luggage (like Giant Purple People Eater) can live under the bus. If something doesn't fit where large luggage is supposed to go, then it will probably fit where small luggage is meant to be, right? UMMM HELLO. Thats what I wanted to scream at them because I was in a sassy mood and worried about missing my connecting bus and exhausted and WATCHING NOAH TRY TO LOAD HIS ENTIRE ARK IN THE SEAT IN FRONT OF MINE.
So once the guy finally gets his box o' bicycle on board, he sees that it really won't be that easy to find a spot for it. So he tries to put it in one of the first seats, but it's obviously too big. So then he looks at the first row of seats in front of me, where a man is sitting. He then asks this man if he could move because he thinks the box will fit. Now I am watching this all unfold, and because I am a very observant person, I know what's going to happen next. You see, the man that's being ousted from his comfortable first row seat? HE'S BLIND. THIS DOUCHEY BICYCLIST IS TELLING A BLIND MAN HE HAS TO MOVE SO HE CAN FIT A STUPID BOX THAT SHOULDN'T HAVE EVEN BEEN ACCEPTED BY GREYHOUND IN THE FIRST PLACE. OK. Phew. I'm sorry. I think I'm done. To end the story, the blind man moved, the box managed to fit in the most precarious way possible, and then the bicyclist essentially says "Oh, don't worry, I don't really care if it gets banged up." Oh, so you don't really care about your precious bicycle that you just moved heaven and earth and displaced a very nice blind gentleman for to place on this Greyhound?! OK then!
At this point I was pretty much just laughing to myself. And wondering what the hell I'm doing on a bus of freaks in TN/AL/MS. We finally got to Birmingham and luckily I had 20 minutes until my next bus. Phew. But then it's time to line up again, the Greyhound guy checks my ticket and ID, and tells me that all bags have to either be checked under the bus or stored above the seats in overhead storage. I'm sorry? I've taken countless numbers of bus rides over the years, including many Greyhound journeys my freshman year in college, and NEVER have I been told that I'm not allowed to have my bags in my lap or under the seat in front of me. This little turd actually enforced this rule too, and inspected all the seats before we left. Is there some national security threat that me having my bags by my feet would pose? Is AL/MS a hotbed of sketchy activity? I'll never know. So I stuff as any snacks as I can in the pouch in front of me and grumpily hurl my bags up top. Honestly it was a stupid bus ride with obnoxious people. The woman next to me, while nice, was completely unaware of the concept of personal space. So she decided to be all up in my business for 5 hours. Things were jabbed into my side, things were put on my lap, and things were being shoved against my arm and my head. I don't know how all of this was possible. But it was.
So once we finally got to Jackson, I popped a couple of Tylenol for my raging headache (couldn't during the ride because both of my bags were up in overhead storage) and found Abby.
For the rest of the night we just hung out, I met some of her friends, and we went out to a bar. It's crazy that I'm in Jackson, Mississippi right now! Now I'm exhausted after a ridiculously long day and all I want to do is sleep. So goodnight!
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